The Quest to self love.

A Quest To Self-Love.

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I want you to know healthy self-love is not self-indulgent, selfish, or egocentric. It is the start of all healthy relationships. How you feel about yourself can either attract or detract from what you want or need out of life. 

“The second most important commandment is like this one, and it is,

 “Love others as much as you love yourself.”

Matthew‬ ‭22:39‬ ‭CEVUK

But why is it a Quest? 

Because it’s an ongoing journey that unfolds with time, as we evolve. 

1 Corinthians 13:4a - defines love as being kind & Patient

Kindness is what Love is willing to give away, & can be seen in how you:

• Speak to yourself: 

I personally detest anyone with a mocking aura around me, and if you’re anything like me, you know how off-putting it can be to be around those people. Yet, isn’t it funny how we speak to ourselves with the same mocking aura? Are you constantly telling yourself you’re ugly? Skinny/Too Thick? Unintelligent etc? How about you get in the habit of speaking kindly to yourself? Reminding yourself how beautiful you are, for you are made in Christ’s likeness. Telling yourself you have the intelligence of God and you’ll use it?

• Think of yourself: 

Do you think you’re unlovable, inadequate, too much, etc? How about you remind yourself that you’re worthy of love despite your flaws? Learn to think rightly and purely of yourself, & not too highly than you ought to, of course. Embrace your quirks, strengths, and weaknesses. Accept yourself for who you are and what you are not.

• Treat yourself: 

Do you eat healthy, exercise, and rest when you need to? Do you treat yourself with small or big gifts, or are you waiting for someone to do that for you? Do you go on solo dates to enjoy your own company? Do you even spend time with yourself, or are you always running to things and people? You won’t know yourself fully and what your needs are if you don’t learn to spend time with yourself. 

Patience is what Love is willing to endure:

• Are you patient with yourself for who you are and who you are becoming? Are you forgiving your naive self for those mistakes, or are you constantly beating yourself up? Are you setting pretty high standards for yourself that you can’t live up to? Are you beating yourself up for making the same mistake over and over again? Learn to be patient with yourself. Identify areas of your struggles and seek help when necessary. Allow yourself to fall and get back up again; you are only human. Strive to be a better version of yourself than yesterday, patiently so. Yet, also acknowledging you won’t always get it right and it’s okay.

I, too, am on this quest for self-love. Sometimes I get it right - sometimes I don’t. Ask God to help you love yourself right all over again and intentionally so. 

I’ll recommend that you read this book by Mark DeJesus - "God loves me and I love myself."